SIX MORE TYPES OF BLACK MEN

This guy is the roughest toughest hoodlum out there, yet he has a sweet, tender side as well. You feel protected with him, even though his machismo may be a little annoying at times. Despite his rough edges, you also feel like you can talk to him like he is one of the girls. Unfortunately, like one of the girls, he also likes men just as much as you do, albeit it is on the "down-low". You see, he is literally keeping "in touch" with all of his "boys" that you see him hanging around.

ADVANTAGES: He will watch Waiting to Exhale with you and not laugh at the wrong times

DISAVANTAGES: He may hit on your brother, and that could get ugly, depending. You also may end up on the Jerry Springer Show.

MR. PRE-PERFECT

ADVANTAGES: He will be successful. Someday.

DISADVANTAGES: By the time you wake up and realize who your Mr. Pre-Perfect is, he is already married to someone else. Or, he is married but doesn't mind seeing you on the side. Or he is bitter, hates black women and now only dates out of his race. Or he has turned gay.

MR. FAT BOY

He's cool, he's calm, he's collected. He can be the life of the party, and can be very outgoing. He has his life together, is mature, and would make an excellent father and provider. Unfortunately he is FAT as all hell, and you find yourself a little turned off by a man who's titties are bigger than yours. Yes I said titties. He doesn't have a CHEST, he has TITTIES.

ADVANTAGES: He really is a good man, just a little big, that's all.

DISADVANTAGES: He may have to borrow your bras. And if you do get him to lose weight, he may gain it all back again, or leave you for a woman half his age who can squeeze into a size 5. He also may have a heart attack in the sack.

MR. DRUGGIE FRESH

He looks good. Real good. He's lean, mean, and on the scene. He knows all of the latest dance steps, and you are attracted to his boyish charm. It really is exciting that a man his age can still be cool without appearing too childish. That's because he the biggest crack head this side of the Missippi. He knows the latest moves because he's hanging at all the clubs where he buy drugs.

ADVANTAGES: His house or apartment is clean and very spacious

DISADVANTAGES: His place is clean because he's too high to get it dirty. His place is spacious because he's selling everything in it to buy more drugs. You'll also notice that for some reason, you can't figure out where that last $20 bill went.

MR. OLDER MAN

You never thought you'd be attracted to an older man, but here he is. He has the looks and energy of a guy your age even though he's as old as your father. He can spoil you rotten and will spoil you rotten, because you are his sweet young thang. Unfortunately, ten or twenty years later, he will dump you for another, younger, sweeter thang.

ADVANTAGES: He's mature. No games. You can go nice places and get a lot of gifts.

DISADVANTAGES: You may have to watch him around your little sister. Or your niece. Or your daughter.

MR. YOUNGER MAN

You never thought you'd have feelings for a guy his age. He's mature, sweet, very talented, and he hasn't yet picked up the bitterness that most men have at your age. Here is a man that you feel you can groom into something that is really special. Unfortunately, he may be out for a fling, or have some weirdo mother complex. Or worse, the nigga may be fronting so that he can get a free ride.

ADVANTAGES: Stamina in the sack. And he's very attentive.

DISADVANTAGES: He could be fronting. Or worse yet, you could be the one who is immature, which is why he is atttracted to you in the first place, until he wakes up and DUMPS you. Or even worse, he is really Oedipal, and you may come home one day and find him rolling in the bed with YOUR MOTHER.