Empty hand free-fighting with other students within your organization at
a tournament is referred to as sparring. Empty hand free-fighting with
students at tournaments who are NOT in your organization is referred to
as "banging".
The foundation of your trapping technique is based on slap-boxing.
The WHITE students in your school refer to the Trench Coat Mafia
as some "crazy white boys".
You listen to "Who Dat" by J.T. Money in order to get you in the mood for
sparring at a tournament.
You use P-Funk to help you get your rhythm before sparring in a tournament.
You use P-Funk to help you get your rhythm before sparring in a tournament AND
YOU'RE WHITE.
Your family tells people you study "Ka-rawd-dee".
Your family tells people you study "Ka-rawd-dee", yet you train in gung fu.
You jump rope with little black girls to help you get your reflexes up before
a competition.
You have ever practiced your jujitsu rolls in an alley.
You have ever used a jujitsu roll to minimize a kick to the face than came from
Ray-Ray while you were kneeling on top of "his boy" and punching him in the face.
You have ever considered applying the techniques of a knife form to a broken
fourty ounce bottle.
You have ever applied the Okinawan Pinan/Heian series to a pool stick.
The white females in your school suck their teeth and roll their eyes when
they are mad.
Your family tells people you study "Ka-rawd-dee" AND YOU'RE WHITE.
You are such a ghetto fighter that the only people at your rank who can beat you is
someone from your particular ghetto dojang.
The white students in your dojang don't like Eminem (he's a white rapper).
You have ever had to stop training because you got food poisoning after eating
some bad chit-tlin's (i.e. chitterlings).
Instead of assuming a classical stance when you are attacked leaving a club,
you duck and let the attacker hit the person behind you. You then beat the attacker
over the head with a shoe.
You're a blue belt (4th gup or kyu) going for brown belt (2nd gup or kyu): you
are such a ghetto fighter that they have to find a ghetto BLACK BELT to fight
you during your exam. And you give HIM a hard time!
If a guy slips up and makes excessive contact, the following conversation
occurs if they are "cool" (i.e., ghetto) "My bad, maaaiin"; "It's awwiightt".
You then continue.
If a guy slips up and makes excessive contact, the following conversation
occurs if they are not "cool" (i.e., ghetto) "Sorry, man"; "It's awwiightt".
You then whip his ass.
If a guy slips up and makes excessive contact, the following conversation
occurs if they are not "cool" (i.e., ghetto) "Oops, sorry"; "It's awwiightt".
You then whip his ass. AND, YOU'RE A WOMAN.
Your family tells people you study "Ka-rawd-dee", yet you train in Judo.
You're so ghetto that even after breaking fourty and laying off from heavy
classroom training for years, you still compete and get first place in sparring.
Every time you go in a club people think that you're a bouncer.
You laugh at the bouncers when they get beat up at a club.
You have ever beaten up a bouncer at a club.
You have ever had to help the bouncers when you were at a club.
You are the person who TRAINS the bouncers at a club.
When performing security at a concert, you let the fights last a few seconds so that
you can either one, spectate and/or two, steal some techniques.
You teachers rate the 1st dan black belts in your organization based on "who can
hang" and "who cain't hang".
You have ever gotten any bunkai or modifications of classical technique for
street purposes from watching "Real TV".
Some of "dem youngstas" in your school wear "Tim-buh-lainz".
You haven't enrolled your "lil' man" in martial arts classes because he can
already throw hand combinations even though he's barely potty trained.
Your "lil' man" servers as a human medicine ball--VOLUNTARILY.
You have ever told one of your students the following: "Nah, man, you need to
tighten yo' form up a lil' more, aw-ight?"
Even though you're a teenage boy in his prime who's been taking martial arts for
years, you still don't think that you can beat up your mama.
Even though you're a teenage boy in his prime who's been taking martial arts for
years, you KNOW that you still can't beat your mama, because she whipped your ass
last week for talking back to her!
Any of the students at your school have had to take time off from training because
they faced the possibility of being locked up.
The students at your school who had to take time off from training because
they faced the possibility of being locked up was YOU.
You are a little dissapointed because you have to compete at the same time at
a tournament as your favorite ghetto black belt fighters because you know you may
not get a chance to see them "whip some ass".
The reason why you have such a low, strong, horse stance is because you have been
letting guys "freak" you from behind on the dance floor.
The reason why you have such a low, strong, horse stance is because you have been
letting guys "freak" you from behind on the dance floor and YOU'RE WHITE.
Your child is more afraid of "the belt" than the are of a black belt.
You have ever told one of your students "Yo' technique look aw-right! You
flowing. You startin' to look smoove!"
You have ever told one of your students the following: "Nah, man, you need to
tighten yo' form up a lil' more, aw-ight?"
After telling a junior student that you cannot spar with him because there are no
black belts or other high ranking third parties around to supervise, his response
is "So whatchu tryin' to say, maiin, you think I'm a PUNK???!!!"
After telling a junior student that you cannot spar with him because there are no
black belts or other high ranking third parties around to supervise, his response
is "So whatchu tryin' to say, maiin, you think I'm a PUNK???!!!" AND HE'S WHITE.
You spar with a junior student even though you know there is no one else around
to supervise because you don't like him. The REAL reason you don't like him is because
he is NOT ghetto.
You spar with a junior student even though you know there is no one else around
to supervise because you don't like him. The REAL reason you don't like him is because
he is NOT ghetto, AND YOU'RE WHITE.
After learning that you are studying martial arts, people try to sneak up on you to
see if they can "steal you". (Note: DC area slang. Substitute the appropriate slang term
for sucker punching someone in your area).
You use the movements from Arnis/Escrima stick training to upgrade your
slapboxing techniques.
After learning that you are studying martial arts, your SISTER CAN sneak up on you
and "steal you", NOT because you can't fight, but because she is more GHETTO than
you are. (Note: DC area slang. Substitute the appropriate slang term
for sucker punching someone in your area).
You execute your horse stance the same way you do when you are "freakin'" a girl from behind on the dance floor.
The reason why you have such a low, strong, horse stance is because you have been "freakin'" girls from behind on the dance floor.
After learning that you are studying martial arts, your GRANDMA CAN sneak up on you put you in a headlock, NOT because you can't fight, but because she is more GHETTO than you are.
The reason why you have such a low, strong, horse stance is because you have been
"freakin'" girls from behind on the dance floor AND YOU'RE WHITE.
Someone has ever told you the following: "Aw main, dese ain't nuthin' like tournaments up in the 'hood, youknowwhati'msayin'??"
Someone has ever tried to sell back to you the rims they stole off of your care while you are on your way to your martial arts class.
Even though your organization his run by a white guy, it's tournaments are still run on C.P. time.
Even though you train in a sport style, the COMBAT stylists admire your fighting ability.
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